My Mom

The end of my freshmen year and this year's Mother's day are in very close proximity. The end of my first year of college has definitely gotten me thinking about the past and the things that God has done for me.

There are so many things that I am thankful for. The thing or rather person, that I am extremely thankful for, is my mom. Almost a year ago, my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer. She had a lumpectomy to remove the cancerous lump in early July last year. She decided to continue on with treatment just to remove any chance of the cancer remaining in her body. She began chemotherapy treatments the day before I had to leave for WSU. She lost all her hair in the process. In October, her chemo ended and radiation treatments began. In December all treatments were finished.

This past April, my mom started to get a rash on her neck. She got several different opinions on it, from co-workers, employee health, etc. When it didn't go away in a few days, she went to her doctor and he gave her a few shots and medications, diagnosing it as a spider bite. However, although the rash decreased, my mom started to develop a fever in the middle of the night. The fever would come on around midnight and break in the late afternoon. Her doctor had instructed her to go to emergency should she ever get a fever. Her immune system was weak from the cancer treatment and they could not afford to take any chances with her. I was hope for spring break at this time so I drove my mom to emergency. There they kept her for several hours and performed many tests, only to come away with the possibility that my mom might have a kidney stone. They had no idea what was causing the fever.

My mom continued to develop a fever, however. The day after I came back to WSU from spring break, my mom went to her doctor. He sent her to emergency and sent an infection specialist to see her. He finally pin-pointed what was going on. My mom had a MRSA staph infection. Following diagnosis, my mom had to get medicine IV'ed to her twice a day. She spent two hours every morning and evening at the hospital and had to keep the IV in her wrist the rest of the time.

A few weeks ago, my mom started feeling pain and noticed swelling where her scar from surgery is. The swelling and pain soon spread. Again, some infection is behind this. I don't know if they have pinpointed exactly what but I think the swelling and pain have decreased.

I was away at college for the majority of my mom and my family's journey with this disease and the repercussions of treatment. I have tried to stay tough through out it the most that I could. I knew God was going to use this to do great things in my family, the majority of which is unsaved (Loveleen and I being the exceptions). It has been very hard. However, there has been a very evident softening of my mom. Many have remarked on just how she glows and cute she is, despite how much she may be suffering. Praise be to God for this softening!

As I think about the relationship that I have had with my mom, it hasn't been a very intimate or close one. I don't really remember ever sharing my dreams with her or asking her about her experiences in life the way a mother and daughter should. My family in general isn't very good at expressing ourselves, especially with one another.

In the last year, with the combination of me leaving and everything with Mom, many things have changed. I am much closer with my siblings and am much more appreciative of my parents. Now, my mom and I talk every night. We aren't quite at the place where we talk about deeper things but I know in talking to her that she loves me. There is a tenderness in the way she talks and tells me that she loves me.
I am so very grateful that God has preserved by my mom. I am grateful that I still have the opportunity to talk to her and someday soon, really get to know her. I am put to tears at the thought that I could have lost my mom and never would have really known her. I am determined to not waste any more of my time with her.

For my mom and her health, I am grateful. Thank you, Jesus.